My heart is heavy tonight. What does that even mean anyway? Does it mean that I experience physical pain in my heart? Yes. Does it mean that inexplicable and, somewhat surprising, tears flow freely? Yes. Does it mean that I have this strange desire to suddenly solve the problems of the world in thirty minutes like my favorite T.V. shows? Most definitely. If only. If only..... I guess I know how this all began today. It seems that a girl I went to high school with - a girl I barely remember - was murdered last night. Murdered! She was tracked down from CT to Rhode Island, and stabbed to death in her car! Why? A conflict with a coworker. A conflict. Exactly what type of conflict, what level of annoyance constitutes murder? I turn on the news, and story after story tells the tale of another bold, brainless monster who feels he or she is entitled. Entitled to money, power, a better job, a better life... I begin to ask myself, is it the parents' fault? Where does the blame lie?
The blame lies with me. The blame lies with us. Sinners. We all have entitlement issues, don't we? We all think the world owes us. People owe us. God owes us. The truth is, we deserve nothing. I have the nerve to be angry that my dad is losing his fight with brain cancer. I have the nerve to believe that I am entitled to have my dad with me longer; that he is entitled to a longer, healthier life, that my kids are entitled to their grandfather. Who do I think I am? I am merely a speck on another speck in this garganuous unexplored universe.
YET, God saw fit to make a way for me to spend eternity with Him. The potter saw fit to become the clay. The Prince became the pauper. Why? So that I, the pauper, could become a Prince, a child of the king, a child of God. Jesus said, "Here on Earth, you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart [BUT TAKE HEART], because I have overcome the World." The war is won. When all is said and done, the battles I win, the battles I lose, mean victory. I can't solve the problems of the world in 30 minutes. But I can tell the world, one person at a time, about the one who did with one death and one ressurection. Whew! What a relief!
